Dear....

Dear Stupid Project Manager,

Please do not change functional specs of rollout on the day of the
rollout. Also, please don't supply the MAC addresses of 73 machines to
be registered for connectivity across multiple VLANs on the rollout day
and expect them to be done on-the-fly, that's a 3-5 day lead-time.
Remember?

Dear Facilities Person,

Please do not suggest drop-dead alterations to the image 24 hours before
rollout. Lockdown was a week ago.

Dear AV Person,

Please remember that my staff are mine. You don't allocate them extra
work, as I have them on MY time. You want extra staff, you source them.
Also, they're not removalists and/or furniture arrangers. None of them
have degrees or certificates in feng shui, so if you want things moved
(that are larger than a PC) to any other place (which is not readily
accessible and/or in the same room it is found in, please source the
requisite person/s yourself. Also, we do not magically have staff which
produce extra long USB/Power/Cat 6/Firewire cables magically from their
orifices. These things are the responsibility of (the lack of)
pre-planning on your part.

Dear All,

When I say incidents of, and requests for, Scope-creep will have your
liver removed, I am NOT joking.
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